CORDIAL MINUET
A two-player ONLINE STRATEGY GAME played for REAL MONEY by JASON ROHRER

To make a husband faithful. Take the marrow from the left leg of a wolf, and with it fill a case of St. Lucia wood. Wrap the case with a piece of velvet, and carry it with you. If you are reasonable and not too demanding, your husband will love no one but you. Secret for traveling twenty miles an hour. Take two ounces of human fat, one ounce of oil of nerves, one ounce of oil of laurel, one ounce of deer fat, and an ounce of natural mummy, with two glasses of wine spirits, and seven verbena leaves. Bring it all to a boil in a small new earthen pot, until it is reduced to half the volume. Then spread the ointment over a new handkerchief, and when you apply it to the spleen area, you will go like the wind. In order not to become ill after traveling, bathe your feet in white wine.

DOOR is OPEN Have you ever wanted all of the POWER with none of the RESPONSIBILITY? Did you know that you can make HAIL STOP by simply saying the RIGHT WORDS? Would you like to SUMMON ASTAROTH to your bedchamber using nothing more than INEXPENSIVE ITEMS found in your kitchen pantry? Have you often dreamed of exercising MENTAL SKILL on your HOME COMPUTER to win REAL MONEY? These and many other astounding things are possible, and it's EASIER THAN YOU THINK. DOOR is OPEN Many people, in fact most people, are still waiting for the HARPOON OF TIME to spear the WHALE OF TRUTH. The fact that you are READING THESE WORDS means you may suspect that this strike is NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN. Unlike the UNWASHED MASSES, you might have always felt like SOMETHING WAS GOING ON. Is it possible to wake up each morning, look in the mirror, and announce with conviction that TODAY IS THE DAY, and most importantly, BE RIGHT? There is only ONE WAY to find out. How many of the FOLLOWING ITEMS apply to YOU? I read the crime reports in the newspaper. I often wake up with neck pain. I would like the job of a forest ranger. I sometimes feel like people are out to get me. I feel sad when I hear about animals getting hurt. I like/enjoy children. If you answered YES to all, any, or even none of these, YOU may be one of the FEW and NOT EVEN KNOW IT. DOOR is OPEN

A secret to win a fortune in games where numbers are foretold. Cut with a scissor small slips of paper, on each of which you should write a number; you can make as many numbers as you wish. Put all these slips in a large box, such that the numbers are facing down. Take a spider, first trap it in a glass bottle for half an hour, then smash it with the magic wand, saying, "Mihi prosint numera per Dominum Deum nostrum!" The spider will curl up and pretend to be dead, but it will not be. Grab it, sprinkle it with holy water, and trap it in the box, where it must remain one entire night. Whereupon, opening the box, you will observe the little slips of paper that have turned, and those numbers will be the good ones, and they will have luck at games.